By my soul
by Rose of Brisingr
Summary: The last flare of day drowns at the border of the horizon wrapping the world in a violet darkness. Thor is quite close. So close that Loki reckons to hear his brother's rapid pulse bucking in his veins. Thor's breathing is a nameless melody. Suddenly the feeling of togetherness is so powerful it brings little tears in Loki's eyes.


Hello first :)

Story is inspired by the wonderful drawings of the talented **Florbe91** (if you want some thorki divineness, go to her tumblr-website)

Setting : Thor and Loki are children here, so the story takes place many years BEFORE Thor 1

Now Have Fun with reading :

* * *

"Loki? Hey, Loki?"

A voice. Bright. Dark. Hissing in his ears. Blood pumping in his veins.

A blink.

The light blends. Too strong, too dazzling. It burns his eyes.

A head shuffles towards the sun. His sun shade. His savior. And his destruction.

Breath in. Breath out. It is spring but his flesh freezes.

Then a face appears. Warm toned skin. Blue eyes made of steel. Mirrors of love. But Loki is scared to find himself in these mirrors, so he turns his gaze to the ground.

A hand reaches after him, pulling on his shoulder. Small, cloddy fingers (soon they'll grow the size of bear paws).

Strength. Such Strength. A trace of fear and fascination. Then suddenly... A hint of envy. And pain. A stab in the chest. Place of origin - ambiguous.

"Come on We go to the forest. There, to the place where the grove lays. I want to play with you."

_'But it's forbidden! Father told us the animals there were too dangerous for us.'_

The words roll like marbles in Loki's mouth, but he can't bring them upon his lips.

Basically he knows he has no choice. He does not want to disappoint anyone. Especially not him.

He is damned. (And if he hadn't been so young, he surely would have hated himself for it.)

A nod. Choked acknowledgement.

"Of course."

His voice reminds of singing glass. Beautiful and inaccessible at the same time. Fragile.

The grin of his brother is unmistakable. Pure joy. Loyalty. Magma. Loki's heart melts within seconds. Nevertheless he feels cold like ice. Even colder than before, which is paradox but true.

But he is fine. He _has_ to be fine right? Fine for his big brother. That's what he thinks. A jerk is running through his limbs as the impatient hurricane (called Thor Odinson) grabs his arm and drags him along. Thor owns the essence of pure lust for Loki feeds on it like bees feed on honey.

Pompous corridors are filling with acoustic noise. The trample of feet. Children's laughter. The taste of innocence laying on their tongues. It goes fast, too fast. Vanishes, hardly known. Maybe it is better this way. Non-permament things are more appreciated. What lasts forever, dies.

Time is like sand running through our fingers.

From distance the palace seems to be nothing more than a soulless crystal vault. Lazily the last rays of the sloping afterglow climb over the smooth, flawless façade. The smell of grass is whirring in the air. Two brothers, which could not be more different, have a stretch on soggy earth and see how the shades of sky enmesh each other, intertwine and mix. New colours are developing.

"Bizarre." Loki says.

"Magnificent." Thor says.

Loki sticks his tongue out at him. His brother jabs him in the ribs laughing. He cannot control his own power. Loki knows the next day a bruise will be seen on his torso. He does not mind it, accepts it like you accept the thunder after lightning.

"Thor?" he asks, but there actually is no question he wants to ask at this moment. It merely is the need to speak out his name, take it between his lips like the shaft of a sharp dagger. One wrong movement, a careless blink of an eye and chaos will supply his tongue with blood.

His brother turns his head, gets closer to Loki till their arms touch softly.

"Yes?" he asks.

The last flare of day drowns at the border of the horizon wrapping the world in a violet darkness. Thor is quite close. So close that Loki reckons to hear his brother's rapid pulse bucking in his veins. Thor's breathing is a nameless melody.

Suddenly the feeling of togetherness is so powerful it brings little tears in Loki's eyes. A sob climbs up his delicate throat only to rush like a roaring waterfall into the quietness. His lower lip quivers and he is not able see anymore. He remains blind, dirty silhouettes are everything what he can cling to.

Hot as fire Thor's fingers fumble for his face, caress his left cheek. "Loki? Loki, what's wrong!?"

Panic sprawls like poisonous weed in the voice, which usually would have burst out in self-confidence. For Loki it sounds like music. He could listen to it for hours. The gloominess slowly clears away. Thor's voice is the anchor Loki tears at while hovering in the deep. Breath. In. Out. He has to learn it again.

"Nothing."

Being angry and embarrassed about himself he rubs his watery eyes.

Where did that come from? An evil daydream? A calenture? ... A foreshadowing?

"Nothing at all." he repeats, has to assure himself about his own words, "It's already late. We should go home now."

Thor does not protest against this, though he would otherwise love to protest. Sometimes simply because of the protest itself, so that he can argue with his little brother. He finds it kinda cute when Loki's thin voice sharpens in anger and when the pale skin of his face burns in a glorious reddish tone. Loki looks alive in all his fury and indignation. Healthy and strong.

But this time Thor is not able to put up a fight between them. He does not dare.

There is something in the tearful look of his brother, which is strange to him. A sternness, no child of their age should be capable of. A forbidden sentiment. It will take many years, until Thor will recognize, what this sentiment means. But when he's ready to understand, he will have forgotten this moment. Forgotten like most adults do forget the bulk of their childhood. Therefor he is not able to help it, yet that does not absolve him from his guilt.

'Yes.' he murmurs, stands up and waits till Loki arises as well. Then he takes his brother by the hand intertwining their fingers to be on the safe side. He didn't do this for two years - now it seems unelectable to him. And he must admit... it does not feel displeasing. Indeed it feels warm and... strangely right.

The early evening covers the fields with their golden spikes and the houses made of polished marble and heavy stone.

Silently Loki ambles next to his brother until they step in front of the palace. He stops abruptly.

"Thor?"

Thor lifts his head in irritation. An unpleasant feeling sprouts in him.

"Yes?" he asks.

Loki's gaze hits the ground. He does not seem to feel good about this. But he opens his mouth and the words spill out like water.

"I... You... Let... Don't leave me alone. Never leave me alone, okay? I-i think, otherwise something bad will happen to me. Something very bad, do you understand!?"

Thor frowns. He would have expected many things but certainly not this.

"Okay. I promise." he answers because he does not know what he should say otherwise. Should he know? He is just a child. A boy,who does not understand death in the painful dimension he later will do. To his amazement Loki shakes his head so that a few midnight black strands fly in the air.

"No, a promise is not enough.' he says strictly, "You have to vow. By your soul."

"By - ?" Thor laughs. "Loki, what are you talking about? You cannot... wait, are you serious?"

Loki looks at him in silence and now Thor realizes that his brother is deadly serious. Never before he meant something so serious.

The young thunder-god watches Loki quietly. He sees the shivery glint in Loki's emerald iris, the discreet tremble of his wiry body. The mouth pinched to a fine line.

He loves his brother. And his brother loves him. A constant of which he thinks, it'd never lose its balance.

He smiles. What are the odds if he swears an oath for the happiness of his second half?

"I vow." he says solemnly, presses Loki's hand until it crackles gently, "I'll never leave you alone. By my soul."

For the first time on this day Loki shows a candid smile. He believes him.

* * *

Centuries later Loki will reminisce about that day while he holds Gungnir in his hands and stands at the balcony abstractedly watching over the wide fields of Asgard.

In the distance a glistening ray of light near the Bifrost tells him that Lady Sif and the warrior three decided to seach for Thor. Against his will. Against the will of their new king. They want to bring Thor back. Out of the exile. Release him from the punishment he was encumbered with because of his own blame and arrogance.

And Loki has no compassion anymore. He does not want to. He will always remember that Thor lied to him.

For Thor broke his vow. For his brother left him all alone when he needed him most.

By his soul.


End file.
